


No Rest for the Wicked (Or Similarly Damned)

by Kairosclerosis



Series: Burning Hearts [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Arsonist, Arsonist!Sam, Background Relationships, F/M, Former Police Officer Samuel Seabury, Kissing, M/M, Mafia AU, Mafia Boss!Charles, Nicknames, Non-Explicit Sex, Non-Graphic Violence, Past Relationship(s), Slow Burn, mafia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-10-29 17:40:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10858875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kairosclerosis/pseuds/Kairosclerosis
Summary: Samuel Seabury will do anything to get Charles Lee's attention.Even if it means burning down the world.(Former police officer Sam tries to get back with his old flame, Charles Lee, using some very dubious tactics. Appropriate, considering Lee is part of the mafia. A very emotional fic, contains some very brief, non-graphic descriptions of violence.)





	No Rest for the Wicked (Or Similarly Damned)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Back at it with another fic (instead of updating my old one). Some background information that's useful when reading this, in case it's too vague: 
> 
> Sam was a police officer, assigned to date mafia boss Charles Lee to get inside information about the mafia's operations. When Lee finds out and leaves him Sam is distraught, having fallen head over heels for the man. This is the story of how far he'll go to regain their lost love. 
> 
> "~•~" Denotes a change in scene/time. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Enjoy!

Three weeks.

It had been three weeks since former police officer Samuel Seabury's superiors called him into their office and shattered his world. They told him the mafia had discovered the real reason he was dating the notorious mafia boss Charles Lee: to get inside information on his operations.

Sam had sped the entire drive home, panicking, only to find every single trace of Charles had vanished from their apartment.

It had been three weeks since he had quit his job. Three weeks of trying to find any way to get Charles' attention, three weeks of crying every single night. He felt like the worst human being to ever have existed. If only he'd told the police the truth from the start. Their relationship was never about getting information; it was about... well, it was about love.

But, three weeks later, he had finally come up with a plan, and a good one.

And as Sam stood in the parking lot, watching the department store burn, he really thought it would work.

~•~

The mafia didn't approach him right away. It took a little while for everyone to realize the fire been deliberately set. Even after that it took a bit for them to decide to reach out. After all, why would some random person decide to do the Mafia's dirty work, burning down a rival gang's store?

But they did reach out, and when Sam heard a knock at the door he answered.

He took the job they offered him, of course. It was only a low level position, no more than a regular arsonist, but he took it. It wouldn't be hard to work his way up.

~•~

Eventually the mass of guilt and pain that had been churning in Sam's chest since he came home to an empty apartment just... hardened. It didn't make him feel like he wanted to throw up every second of the day anymore. It didn't keep him at the brink of tears. It didn't force him to replay his last conversation with Charles every five minutes. It hardened into a mass that filled up his heart and dulled any emotion.

In fact, Sam's emotions were dulled to the point were he wasn't sure he could feel any. It made it easier to do his job, burning down buildings and bridges and whatever the fuck the mafia needed him to. It made it easy enough that he began to rise through the ranks, becoming known for his ruthlessness.

He knew he'd made it when Alexander Hamilton himself walked into his apartment at three AM and gave him his next assignment.

Hamilton was Lee's second hand, everyone knew it. If Sam could keep doing what he was doing, drawing on his police training and this mass in his chest to do his job amazingly efficiently, well... he could rise up even more.

Enough to see Charlie again.

He took every single assignment Hamilton gave him, and he did so with no remorse. Sleep became less important, eating became less important. The important thing was to complete each assignment, to report back to Alex, and then to repeat the cycle. Underneath it all was a pull to get to Charles, a deep and pure longing. He honestly believed that if he was good enough he could prove to Charles that they should still be together.

All he needed was a couple minutes, enough time to explain himself. That would be enough time to explain that he had always loved Charles. It would be enough to prove he'd never told the police anything, and then it would be alright. Then they could be together.

One day Hamilton came to him with a new assignment. Sam wasn't supposed to burn something: the order was to burn some/one/, nice and slow, make them feel the pain.

He did it, no questions asked.

Afterwards Alex brought him to a building on the other side of town. It was so full of winding hallways that Sam knew he'd never be able to retrace their steps. At the end of the hallways there was a huge door, and Alexander led him into it.

And there he finally was, looking into the eyes of Charles Lee, after thirteen long months.

Sam looked over every detail carefully, in the span of a second, taking in the room.

A meeting. Mafia bosses. Charles at the head of the table, looking right at him.

Expressionless.

And then he looked away.

~•~

Fucking Charles' co-workers was no harder than killing people, as disturbing as that sounds. All it took was a sultry glance in the hallway, a few choice words in passing, a hand trailed across a man's lapels. Sam took them down one by one: Marquis, Washington, Burr, the list went on and on.

The mass in his chest had transformed after that first meeting with Charles. The asshole didn't care about him at all anymore. He didn't want to listen to Sam, probably had never had real feelings for him. Now all Sam felt was anger, and a whole lot of it.

It manifested in lots of ways. Sleep before had become less of a priority, now Sam willfully stayed up for days on end. He ate takeout (if he ate at all) and took assignment after assignment after assignment.

When he wasn't working he was being fucked.

The easiest way to completely piss Charles off had seemed to be to sleep with every single person the man knew. It wasn't even that hard--Sam could easily pick someone up in the hallway and get fucked nice and fast in a closet, then go report to Charles.

Now that his assignments were all high priority, they went straight to Lee or Hamilton. Sam delighted in coming in to report with red cheeks and just-fucked hair, thoroughly making Charles angry before leaving.

It wasn't even that bad to have sex with people he had no attraction to. He would just lay there, bent over a table or pushed into the wall and close his eyes, then wait for whoever it was to finish. Every once in a while a rage would completely grip him and he'd take control, riding whoever was under him as hard as he could, eyes burning and mind filled with images of his Charlie from so goddamn long ago.

Those moments were rare, though. He tried not to think of Lee as anyone other than his boss. There was nothing he could do about the man monopolizing his dreams (and not even sex dreams. Just regular ones about making dinner together or cuddling on the couch after work). There was nothing to be done about the pangs in his chest when Lee talked to someone prettier and younger than him. But he could control his conscious thoughts, and they didn't focus on Charles.

Although sometimes he couldn't help but think about how Charles' eyes had flashed when he'd caught Sam fucking Angelica Schuyler, one of their top executives, in the men's bathroom. How his jaw had tightened deliciously.

Later, he'd pulled Sam aside and murderously whispered "I thought you considered vaginas 'disgusting'."

Sam had smiled, all teeth, and quickly snapped "well, I've fucked a lot of disgusting things, haven't I?"

~•~

Everything deteriorated so quickly.

Sam wasn't choosing not to sleep anymore, he just couldn't. He got no satisfaction out of having sex, but had such a reputation that he couldn't really say no. He didn't feel anything except tired, and couldn't even summon up the courage to sass Lee.

A few weeks ago he'd tried to seduce Alexander himself and had been whisked off on a two week assignment before he could say "wait". It had been the first mission he'd ever fucked up on, as part of the building hadn't even burned down.

He wasn't even good at his job anymore.

Sam was all cutting edges. Bags were etched so deeply underneath his eyes that he looked like a ghost. He'd lost so much weight that a strong wind could blow him over, and people had stopped asking him to fuck after hours. A quick shag was fine for some, but he was no longer the firey young arsonist with something to prove.

The mass in his chest dragged him so far under that it didn't even feel like he was alive. His body was operating on its own, Sam was somewhere inside, unable to talk or do anything except work.

He was deep inside, watching Charles every time he got a glimpse. God, he wished he had quit being a policeman as soon as Charles had moved in. He wished he could admit that he was in excruciating pain, even now, and he wanted, needed his Charlie to hold him.

But he couldn't.

~•~

Two and a half years.

It had been two and a half years since he'd come home to an empty house. Almost a year and a half since he'd seen Charles again for the first time. Six months since he'd slept with a woman for the first time, just to annoy Lee. A month since he'd failed his two week mission.

Sam stood at the top of a two story building and looked over the city, feeling empty. It was a cold night, but the flames devouring the roof behind him warmed his back.

He should run, he should get out, but Sam just stood there. This job wasn't going to fail. He would stay, make sure every single thing here burned. And if he burned too?

So be it.

At that moment, looking at the drop to the street below, Sam was finally able to admit to himself that he had never stopped loving Charles. The other man may have stopped loving him, forgotten about him completely, but Sam just couldn't. Loving Charles had been a constant since the mafia boss had stepped into his life, and it would be a constant until he left.

As Sam pondered this, he heard a fizzing sound behind him. What was that?

Oh, fuck. The gas tanks.

~•~

Sam limped back into headquarters more banged up than he'd ever been in his life. Turns out being flung off of a two story building doesn't kill you, but he was sure that he had at least two broken ribs. It wasn't an option to go to the hospital, considering the police would be loking for him, but Eliza or Madison could fix him up later. They were good with that shit. 

First, though, he had to give his report.

Charles was sitting at his desk when Sam walked in, and when he glanced up his face turned white. "Sam," the man said, rising from his desk, and the arsonist couldn't help but take a step back. The emotion on Lee's face... What was that? Why would he look so worried now, when Sam was all but destroyed? It would only take a few more weeks for him to mess up enough to die, he was sure of that. Charles shouldn't start worrying now.

"The job went fine," he said, rushing into his report, attempting to get away from the feelings rising up in his chest. Not the time, not the time, just because Charles looked like he was going to cry didn't mean Sam had to. He hadn't cried for two and a half years, and he wasn't going to now.

"Sam," Charles said again, and the agent blanched, then turned to rush out of the room.

A hand on his wrist stopped him, and he was being pulled back into strong arms. Charlie's arms. And then he was being kissed.

The mass in his chest completely dissolved.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it! I have several more parts of this story, detailing moments in this universe and the progression of Sam and Charles' relationship. Let me know if you want me to post them! Comments and kudos make me write faster <3


End file.
